Post by ALTAÏR IBN-LA'AHAD on Nov 23, 2012 22:52:40 GMT -6
Alright, let's begin. This is the first time I will be reviewing character profiles, so for anyone else this is what to expect when I grade them.
You have a few typos in places. You put 'beech' instead of 'beach' for his hair. In the history, you have 'steak' instead of 'stake'. In the sample you have 'rode' instead of 'road'. So on and so forth.
For his appearance, it's a little confusing. Which arm in the mechanical one? And then in the history you mention he has his leg that way as well but did not mention it in the appearance.
Also, you have to write a sample post for the character you're applying for. You can't use Xenos' sample twice. Write one for Nanahara please.
For his time you simply put 'past'. What year or what era? The past could be any year in the past. Please specify.
So until you change the sample post (at least), this will continue to be pending.
You have a few typos in places. You put 'beech' instead of 'beach' for his hair. In the history, you have 'steak' instead of 'stake'. In the sample you have 'rode' instead of 'road'. So on and so forth.
For his appearance, it's a little confusing. Which arm in the mechanical one? And then in the history you mention he has his leg that way as well but did not mention it in the appearance.
Also, you have to write a sample post for the character you're applying for. You can't use Xenos' sample twice. Write one for Nanahara please.
So until you change the sample post (at least), this will continue to be pending.
